STORY WRITTEN BY MY FATHER TWO YEARS BEFORE HE
WENT TO BE WITH JESUS.

"IF YOU HAVE NEVER HAD TROUBLE YOU HAVEN'T LIVED
LONG ENOUGH. TROUBLE WILL FIND YOU. IT FOUND ME
AND STILL HAS ITS FOOT ON MY NECK. HAVE YOU LOST
YOUR WIFE, OR HUSBAND YOU DEARLY LOVED MORE THAN
LIFE? I WALKED INTO THAT KIND OF DARKNESS GOING ON
THREE YEARS NOW. IN THE HOSPITAL, I SAID, HEAL HER
OR TAKE HER. HE TOOK HER. I AM STILL BEING CHOKED
BY GRIEF. THIS IS A ROAD I NEVER TRAVELED BEFORE.

IN THE BIBLE,(JESUS SAID, I'LL NEVER LEAVE YOU OR
FORSAKE YOU.) ONE NIGHT WHILE FEELING SO LOW, YOU
PROMISED SO WHERE ARE YOU? HE SEEMED TO SAY,(DO YOU
WANT ME TO LEAVE, SO YOU CAN TELL THE DIFFERENCE?)IN
A SPLIT SECOND I REPLIED, NO, DON'T DO THAT!

IN MY MIND, I STARTED REMEMBERING THE THINGS THAT HAD
HAPPENED IN THE YEARS, SINCE SHE WENT TO LIVE WITH
HIM. I HAVE WRITTEN MOST IN VERSE FORM. I HAVE WRITTEN
FIVE NOVELS IN THE LAST THREE YEARS, TRYING TO HIDE
FROM REALITY. THEY SET ON THE SHELF LOOKING AT ME.

MY FIRST COUSIN, PAINTED A TWENTY ONE FOOT LONG BY
EIGHT FOOT HIGH MURAL IN THE CAFETERIA OF THE E.A.
CONWAY HOSPITAL. THE PAINTING IS IN MEMORY OF MY WIFE.
RECENTLY, WHILE AT MY COUSIN'S HOME IN WACO, TEXAS,
WE WERE BUSY GLAZING AT BACK PORCH. I ENJOY THE RETIRED
MISSIONARY SO MUCH. LATE ONE NIGHT, I WAS STILL FIGHTING
THE DEMONS OF LONELINESS. THE FIGHT GOES ON NIGHT AFTER
NIGHT, DAY AFTER DAY, AND YEAR AFTER YEAR.

LORD, TOMORROW DO SOMETHING SPECIAL, SOMETHING SO DIFFERENT,
I WILL KNOW IT WAS FROM YOU. I PRAYED. IT WAS NO FORMAL
PRAYER. I WAS JUST TALKING TO HIM. YOU KNOW HOW IT IS WHEN
YOU HAVE BEEN KNEELING BY YOUR BED. THE NEED WAS REAL. I
COULD GO BACK TO MY HOUSE IN MONROE, BUT I COULD NEVER GO
HOME. SHE WAS MY HOME.

THE NEXT MORNING, WE WERE UP EARLY TO BEAT THE HEAT. THE
TREES OFFERED SOME SHADE. ALL OF A SUDDEN, I NOTICED A WHITE
DOVE IN A TREE NOT FORTY FEET FROM WHERE WE WERE WORKING.
I HAD NEVER SEEN A WHITE DOVE BEFORE, AND I AM A GREAT-
GRANDPA. MY COUSIN WENT INTO THE HOUSE FOR A MINUTE AND THE
WHITE DOVE LOOKED STRAIGHT AT ME. I WHISTLED A DOVE CALL.
MY COUSIN CAME OUT AND WE WENT TO THE BACK OF THE YARD TO GET
SOME WINDOWS. THE DOVE DID A STRANGE THING. THE WHITE DOVE FLEW
BETWEEN US CIRCLED ONCE AND WAS GONE. I'LL NEVER FORGET HOW
BEAUTIFUL IT WAS, SO CLOSE I COULD HAVE TOUCHED IT. JESUS CERTAINLY
GAVE ME SOMETHING DIFFERENT. IT HAS BEEN WEEKS NOW AND MY COUSIN
HAS NOT SEEN THE WHITE DOVE. JESUS ANSWERS PRAYERS AND KEEPS HIS
PROMISES.
I AM NOT ALONE.
GRANDPA ERNIE - 1998